Sorry for LONG Delay of Update!!

Very sorry for the long time since the blog was last updated! The last few weeks have been long, mostly sad / difficult and have required me to be focused on Lou and his needs. At the end of the day - taking care of Lou and keeping up with my work - there's just not much left - especially since things overall, have not been going well! Writing about everything is good for my soul - but....at times like these, also depressing to me because putting it in black and white seems so "final"! But....do want to get everyone updated - so...here goes!

After the last chemo in the last blog - the Dr. did change Lou from the Oxaliplatin to a different chemo drug called Irinotecan. This drug hopefully is slowing down the fast progression of the liver tumors, but....I don't have the latest CEA number yet! Should have them tomorrow. Unfortunately, the CEA number since February, continued to go up and up! But....2 weeks ago - while it hadn't gone down any - it had slowed significantly! It had been going up 500 ng/mL every two weeks - but....in the next 4 weeks after that, it only went up 150 ng/mL. We're hoping the number tomorrow will show that it's either stopped going up and/or that it's gone down some! The good news is that finally 2 weeks ago - the liver function numbers had started showing signs of improvement - first time for improved numbers here since everything started going up last fall! And....those numbers continued to go down again slightly when we got some of the numbers today. So, for that, we are quite thankful! However, the Irinotecan - which seemed to not cause too much of a problem for Lou in the first and second sessions as far as side effects - has now caused him to be quite ill feeling for the last 2 sessions and it has also caused him to have fairly significant diarrhea. He becomes so tired and lethargic that all he can do is stay in bed. Unfortunately, that has resulted in him not eating - and the combination of the diarrhea and not eating = additional weight loss and dehydration! To say that Lou is thin is an understatement - unfortunately, frail and skeletal are more appropriate terms. He's finally rallying slightly in the last 2 days after strong regiments of diarrhea medicines, pedialyte, probiotics, and eating more! Since the last chemo almost 2 weeks ago - he's been in bed or in his chair all but 3 days! When we went for the Dr.'s appointment today - it was decided to NOT have the chemo treatment scheduled for tomorrow. Twofold reason - we are supposed to go to Maui again next Monday. Since Lou has been so weak and unable to even walk much of the time in the last two weeks - the Dr. thought that having another chemo tomorrow with him in such a weakened state would probably only exacerbate the problem - and Lou had already said that he'd made an "executive" decision to NOT have chemo tomorrow because he is DETERMINED to get to Hawaii on Monday! (At one point, as only Lou could say - he told me that he was going to Hawaii even if "he had to crawl there"!! So...we're going to need prayers for him to continue getting stronger before Monday! Otherwise, not sure how we're going to make it through the flight, etc. and get to Hawaii!! We'll take the transport chair with us - had to take it with us today just to get him to the Dr.'s office because he's so very weak! But....hopefully, he'll make some good progress on gaining some strength back in the next 4 days since there will be no chemo tomorrow!

Of course, I'm concerned about what it will mean for this very ugly and aggressive cancer to NOT have the chemo treatment - but....truthfully - with Lou's fragile weight at the moment and how sick he's been - if he can actually gain some strength and weight over the next two weeks before the next chemo - it may be the better thing to happen! And....with his utter determination to make this trip - I know he's going to be fighting to be better / stronger! As with everything else with this insidious disease - no way to know what's best or right or wrong! Just have to pray the right decisions are being made! Of course, I want more time - but.....obviously, that's NOT a decision I get to make! So.....prayer is everything!

I really appreciate (and Lou does too!) - the continued prayers and support! The notes, e-mails, calls, visits - help both of us and we cannot thank you enough! The whole thing feels so lonely and yet, there have been so many blessings along the way too - such a mixed bag of emotions! Hope I'll have "Aloha" news in the next blog! That will mean things have improved at least for a while! The last few weeks have been overwhelmingly depressing / difficult for both of us - although - I try to have my moments in private - definitely serves no good purpose if I can't keep a more positive attitude for Lou when he's feeling so sick! Requires a lot of patience and prayer (and prayer for patience!!)!! The Lord has been so good to us / me in these quite difficult and extraordinary times!

Thanks again for your continued prayers, love, and support!
Blessings to all!
Love,
Deb